Feeling Eccentric

I've had a couple uplifting days, a handful of happiness shared between my significant other any myself. Although sometimes, I feel like my voice falls on deaf ears around my friends. It doesn't really bother me all that much since I don't have a lot of close friends and the few that I do have are really loving and supportive. A new appreciation for them has been filling my heart since my last journal.

Also, perhaps my muse hasn't gone on vacation, maybe I'm just not listening to her with the right frame of mind. Maybe my obsessive mind frame about certain art styles needs to be relaxed a touch and I need to step back from the tree line to really look at the trees instead of just focusing on the bark. I think that I'll go ahead and expand my basic photography skills a bit more. [Everyone] has to start somewhere.

Generally, I'm going to attempt to hold my tongue more and be a better person since we already have a lovely overflow of horrid people in the world... We could use a few more 'nice guys'. As long as I'm not sacrificing my dreams and goals, who's it going to hurt, really?

No one.

Exactly.

I think I need to learn how to be better at being Thankful. Does that make sense? There's so much shit that just goes wrong all the time. Someone said something that kind of struck me the other day, something I'd heard before, but never really thought about. Simply "you make your own luck". She was talking about how horrible she felt when one thing after another had gone wrong in her life until she realized that the reason everything had gone wrong was because of the choices [or lack thereof] she had made. Whether through inaction or wrong action she had just screwed her life until she felt that she was dead and buried. I don't want to get there. I understand that we all have bad days that no amount of preparation can save... but I just want to be happy and reach my goals. I want to stop being my "own worst enemy" as my other half says.

Feeling Eccentric by Ariadne Smith